no matter how small

Never underestimate how far a compliment can go.

another day, another crush

My latest piece of eye candy at work has suddenly and under unfortunate circumstances had to move back to his hometown, due to a death in the family. Though I did not get to know him as well as I would have liked, I will miss him all the same. Hopefully I'll get to see you again, someday...

For crying out loud, you were able to take my mind off of B-- a task unaccomplished by anyone else, so far...

On this note. Where do I stand on my beloved B? I'm more confused now than ever. It goes like this:

Either, this infatuation with B is merely a crush and nothing more, due to the fact that the very next time a cute boy paid me any attention, I was able to (momentarily?) forget about him.

OR... it isn't just a crush and maybe I do love him as much as I sometimes speculate. In this case, the fact that I was so easily distracted by a new boy is nothing more than my attempt to forget about you and move on by whatever means necessary.

In other words. I'm either too eager to fall for you, or I'm too eager to fall for someone (anyone) else to avoid falling for you.

I guess only time will tell for sure.

((Don't I sound more 15 than I do 22??))

a lesson well learned

This week, I learned a lesson that will be forever valuable to me. Things are not always as they seem and it is not at all worthwhile to jump to conclusions until all the facts have been laid out in front of you. I secretly cursed (in my head) a boy on whom I was crushing and turned my back on one of my best friends all because (as my friend, Julie, so nicely put it) a gossipping little troll decided to run his mouth and tell a bunch of lies to start a war. By reacting so quickly, I let him win.

But no more. You just have to remember that your friends won't suddenly turn their backs on you, and your gut is usually right.

Thanks, Kory, for that unintended life lesson.

lazy bones

I woke up at 12:45 today... I have never done that... what the hell??

I know there's really no such thing as "catching up" on sleep, but I like to think that's what I accomplished by sleeping well into the afternoon.

BUT, I did make it to the gym-- something I've been slacking on the last couple of months. I woke feeling motivated to do something productive to counter-act my 12-hour slumber. And I feel good. It is my goal to hit the gym every day this week. It's all about baby steps.

something new

Friday night I had the pleasure of hanging out with a boy from work that I'm quite keen on. No, this isn't "B" (yay!!). His name does start with a B though. Hmm...how will I differentiate?

I digress... Luckily, I have really good friends, and one of them told this guy that I've got it for him. We never talked about it specifically, but he did spend the rest of the night talking to me :-)

Super nice, hard-working, and soo adorable... I've got my fingers crossed...

Friday night, I actually thought to myself, "B, who?"

stuck on you

my heart aches. literally aches for you. days like today, I realize it may be for the best if you remain my best friend and only that. but the things that make you my best friend are the same things that make you the object of my affection.

and oh god, if you get that job an hour away, I think I might die.